By Captain Tenneal\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now that we have seen EPIC GREATNESS in the Dadbod’s back to back championships, y’all bums have some -ish to work on to get to that level. We here at Grinders HQ have some New Year’s Resolutions for each and everyone of you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Zach, Peyton, Crazy Al: Eat a cheeseburger or 2. You don’t look like men. You look like one of the Olsen twins. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Worm, Corey: Come to Eldridge early and look at the rim. Study it. Become one with it. Maybe this will help reduce all those freakin’ air balls. Embarrassing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
HOF E: This go-around as captain win at least ONE…..just ONE game for the love of god<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe invest in a Grinders fantasy book and do some research for the auction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ford: “Go to work” more instead of going to work more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Helmet, “Lil\u201d Josh, Old Man Jon, Todd “Freaking” Nixon: Get your heads out of your asses and show the league that you’re not THIS terrible at this game. Mix in a shot or a rebound, or ANYTHING that actually positively contributes to your GAPE.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jon Witt: Missing a session??? Tape a damn aspirin to it. You’re not even 40 yet. No excuse for not playing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Justin: Look at yourself in the mirror. Have your wife measure your height. Remember that you’re freaking tall and try and use it for once.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Cole: Eat less. For the love of god drink less. You’re starting to look like Yokozuna instead of your usual fat, slothy self. It’s called a diet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Josh Lanzot, Mike Milicki, Mark Doyle, Jimmy, Tirado: There is an actual bar where we play. They sell beer, food, etc. They allow Grinders to stay and have a drink or two after the games. TRY IT FOR ONCE.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Tommy Hughes, Jeff May: Find the fountain of youth. You folks used to dominate this league at times. Figure it out. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Matt Vaillancourt, Chuck Thomasulo: Maybe once try playing in the games that count like its’ open run. Best non-pressure, game don’t matter, players I’ve ever seen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Gersitz: Stop being a cupcake in big game moments. Dude is fantastic at magic. 3 minutes left in the game or less and the dude goes Houdini. Good luck finding him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Curt: Only play in the regular season. No one will make fun of you. That’s when you’re good. Treat the playoffs like Richie does. Just don’t show up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Richie: Nothing we suggest could possibly help. Retire at the bottom. Speaking of bottoms, what’s your sister up to these days?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kellen: Try some inserts Basketball is a tall-main’s game. Oompa loompas don’t belong. Get one of those inversion tables and stretch yourself out. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Salvati: Grow a pair. Your freaking labia gets in the way every time you go to shoot. Stop being a wishy-washy cuckold and make a decision on the court already.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
New Guys Joe and Boccio: Come in and have fun. Grinders HQ will be watching. Don’t turn into a Summer’s Eve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Pauly P: Welcome back. Get a right hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
By Captain Tenneal\u2026 Now that we have seen EPIC GREATNESS in the Dadbod’s back to back championships, y’all bums have some -ish to work on to get to that level. We here at Grinders HQ have some New Year’s Resolutions for each and everyone of you. Zach, Peyton, Crazy Al: Eat a cheeseburger or 2. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[12,25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2212","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-captain-tenneal","category-weekly-reviews"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2212","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2212"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2212\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2212"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2212"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/grinders.live\/basketball\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2212"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}