The Path to Grinder Glory


Hello Grinders faithful. Have you missed us? We sure haven’t missed you! Just kidding… mostly. Yes, it’s true – we’ve been slacking pretty hard here at Grinders HQ. If you want the truth, we’ve found this session extremely boring. Not worth our time really to step away from our extremely interesting and very cool lives to write down our thoughts about all this mid basketball being played. What do you want from us? Here’s your recap of Weeks 3 through 9: Cole’s team and Pauly P’s team are annoyingly good. Every other team is subpar and borderline lousy. Recap over.

But in all seriousness, I have felt a little bad that you haven’t had our weekly goodness to absorb with your eyeballs. So, while this won’t be a recap article, I thought it was a neat and new idea. I’ll be going down the line and detailing how achieving Grinders glory is a possibility for each team. And, because you all suck, I’ll also be detailing how every team will NOT win the Grinders championship. (I’m sure there’s better verbiage for what I’m doing here. You’ll get the gist.)


1 – TheMV(Pauly)P’s
When these guys actually show up to play, they are a nightmare for defenses. You have last sessions real MVP, captain Pauly; perennial PITA and 1st Team All-Grinder lock Gersitz, and a healthy Mike Malicki. In my opinion, this team can F right off. Salvati is that 4th man everyone wishes they had, with his grit and grind play style and ability to hit a fair share of his open jumpers. Pending no more season-ending injuries, I fail to see how these guys aren’t in the final 2. They move the ball well, they force defenders into 1-on-1 situations, and they hit their shots at an above average rate. Especially Gersitz, casually hitting 60% of his attempts. So lame!

Key to Success: Just have all hands on deck. Boring analysis I know, but would anyone disagree? They have the size and athleticism to matchup against bigger teams, and Pauly P and Salvati are more than capable on the perimeter.


Key to Failure: Besides injury, the only weakness I can think of is if we see the return of 2023 Malicki where he shoots 0/20 or whatever, and if Gersitz is somehow held below 20 points. They would need to play horrendously to fall short of a ring this season.


2 – TeamSlimThick(Cole)
Speaking of annoying teams to play against… the most intimidating big man duo we’ve seen in quite some time of Cole and Wayne have been terrorizing small chumps for months. Hate em or love em, both men are averaging double doubles, and even Richie is flirting with a double double himself somehow. People forget he’s on the team! Tirado and Chuck let it fly from deep while Wayne and Cole play bully ball down low. And they can also shoot from range. Stupid team I say. Their only 2 losses came due to being short handed (missing either Cole or Wayne) and while they’ve had a few close calls, they know how to hunker down and come up clutch. And while we haven’t seen it too often, if the shots are falling from 3, there might not be a team that can keep up offensively. Again, not to be boring, but I fail to see a future where this team isn’t defending their championship in a couple of weeks.

Key to Success: Feed the top 2 guys. Let Wayne and Cole do damage down low, and defenses will be forced to bring help, leaving Tirado/Chuck open on the outside. They’ve shown that they’re a tough team to score on, so exploit any mismatches, score how you can, pass the ball around, and like Pauly P’s team, force those 1-on-1 situations.


Key to Failure: Cole and Wayne rain suck, and Tirado/Chuck/Richie can’t carry them on their backs. Granted, I don’t think anyone could carry those two guys at once, unless you’re an Olympic power lifter, and even then I’d still be concerned for your health and well being. Get it because heavy. The only team that’s given Cole’s squad problems is Pauly P’s. Everyone else is just not big/good enough. They’d need an extremely poor offensive performance to fall short of the championship game. Or maybe Tirado channels his inner Bang Bang and shoots 2/30 from the field.


3 – Team “MyRock”(Peyton)
I am confused. Should a team with two guys on the All-Grinders Teams be 4-5? The young captain’s squad has lost 4 of their last 5, and we don’t even have to bring up the squandered 15 point lead from two weeks ago… against Old Man Jon nonetheless. Nearly half of their games have been decided by one possession, but is that really the problem? On paper this should be a top 2 team – Peyton really went all in with what should be a small-ball death lineup with Jimmy, $5 Tommy and Bryant. Worm was on the team, then wasn’t, and then was again, and he has been decent if unspectacular (when he shows up). Sure, on draft day it was determined this would be an extremely boom-or-bust lineup. Especially with having no true big man. Perhaps the youngling failed to take into account that by putting together such an offensive-minded squad, literally no other team will play anything but zone, and sometimes they just look flummoxed by it, especially against teams with size. Something just feels off, especially when everyone on the court seems to flourish when they’re ball-dominant.

Key to Success: Move the damn ball more! We’ve seen everyone have their moments, but when every team plays zone against you, you have to keep the ball moving and find an opening. Also, you have 3 of the fastest and most athletic guys in the entire league. Run that fastbreak – and don’t be afraid to ride the hot hand. If all 5 guys can coexist and distribute the rock evenly, a late season run is certainly not out of the picture.


Key to Failure: Play selfish and take forced shots. Which we’ve seen from multiple guilty parties. Sometimes the shots aren’t falling, and that’ll happen, but forcing low percentage shots against teams with better cohesion is the reason why this talented team has been doing up short.


4 – Team “Where’smyfoul?!” E
Bolstered by the league giant Tall Justin, this team has seen some ups but more downs – it’s unclear what the root of their 4-6 record is. 4 guys (Justin, Ford, Zach, and Ben) have GAPEs in the double digits and respectable shooting percentages over 33%. Captain E’s production has dipped, but this analyst has noticed the sharp uptick in assists this session, as E is averaging 4 dimes a game! When Justin is being tall and stuff and Ford goes to work or whatever, they are not an easy out. They have the ability to control the boards against most other teams, and they don’t turn the ball over too often – it really seems like it’s just a matter if everyone shows up to play or not. If Justin and Ford are connecting, and Ben/E can contribute, I don’t think it’s too far-fetched for them to make it at least to the semifinals.


Key to Success: Let Justin hit his unblockable jump shots, and everyone else plays 3&D ball. Ideally we’d have to see E knock down some of his patented pull up jumpers and drive, Zach can hit his open looks from 15 feet and in, and Ben + Ford have shown this season they’re capable of hitting from range. And when things aren’t going their way, whether it’s on the court or off of it, they have to keep their composure.


Key to Failure: A cold streak can be trouble for pretty much any team, but since E will be playing Team Al in the playoff opener, I went back and looked at the box score when these two last squared off. E shot 50% on his way to 22 points, and Justin had a double double with 18 points and 15 rebounds. The issue is that Ben and Ford shot for a combined 20% from the field (1/11 and 2/17, respectively). Not great! And they only lost to Al by 2 points. Another thing I noticed is in most of their losses, the opposing team generally has significantly higher game shooting percentages. I’m not saying they are bad defensively, but against some the more potent offenses in the league (Peyton, Cole, Pauly P) it will be tough to hang in there if one of their scorers goes cold.


5 – Team “NoDAllowed” Al
Maybe this is an exaggeration due to last week’s OT thriller, in which they fell short in the battle for the 3 seed 81-83. But, looking through their session, every team team Al has faced has scored more than 50 points. In fact, the lowest opposing final score in their 1-4 start to the session was 58. They have improved slightly in that regard over the last 5 games, not allowing an opponent to score over 60 – but they’ve shown that they need an all around scoring effort to overcome their opponents. Hell, last week Jeff May dropped 39 points on nearly 50% shooting, and they still couldn’t pull out the victory. There’s no doubt that they have an above average offense, with Jeff May and Garrett averaging over 18 PPG and Al/Joe both in the double digits as well. Nixon, while only appearing 4 games this session, is a nice complementary option as well. But giving up 83 points with playoff implications on the line feels pretty telling to me.


Key to Success: Overcome offensive onslaughts. From a numbers standpoint, you can pretty much chalk in at least 50 points from the other team. I’d say defense is the key, but that just doesn’t appear to be in Al’s gameplan. So, I’d say let Jeff May and Garrett get theirs, let Joe cook down low every now and then, and have Al hit his signature baseline jumpers – as long as everyone shoots around 40-50 percent, there’s a chance they can win some duels. With the playoff opener against team E, who they split their session series with, they are susceptible to cold shooting streaks – Al’s team needs to capitalize if such a situation arises.


Key to Failure: Defensive ineptitude. If they have all hands on deck and have a sub to work with, maybe they can let their guys get some rest – but this is the most glaring issue with this team. I’d say there’s still a chance if Jeff May goes nuclear and everyone else contributes handily, but then I look at last week where that happened and it still didn’t matter. I don’t really know a solution, so I’ll just say “D the F up.”


Team “Curtis” Jon
Unfortunately, despite Curtis averaging 32 PPG, Team OMJ is the first Grinders team to miss the playoffs.

Key to Success: Curtis play good.

Key to Failure: Curtis play not good.

Blurb end.


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