Category: Blog

by Guy LeDouche

Grinder Rules…

Teams:
The championship team of the previous session has the ability to stay together if they choose.

Overtime
One Time Out in OT
OT is 5 minutes, 3 minutes, Tie in the regular season
OT in playoffs is always 5 minutes

Possession arrow determines who gets the ball at the beginning of the second half

Tie Breaker:

  1. Head to Head Record
  2. Overall Point Differential
  3. Head to Head Point Differential
  4. GAPE Chicken decides

Other Stuff:

If there is a clear path to the basket and the foul is deemed cheap and unnecessary (on a fast break for example) the play will result in the bucket and ball.

Over and back will be called at some point in second half

Only top 5 make the playoffs

Under a minute in second half you can foul. Has to be the ball handler. And the team that gets fouled can pick who they want to foul. You get a one and one situation. No matter the outcome the ball goes to the other team

Forfeits: Any games that are decided by forfeit will result in a final score of 58-47.

by Kenny Blankenship

Playoff Preview, League Awards

First, the league would like to do its first awards ceremony and league banquet following the finals next week, 6/16. Reserve your spot now. Normally I’d review last week’s games but everyone would know how that would go…… Curt sucks. Grey is fragile. Ford’s master plan works yet again. Bla bla bla. Same ol’ ‘ish. IT’S PLAYOFF TIME BABY!!! LFG!!!!

2021 Playoff Season 2 Preview

Team Mike 4/1
Team Curt 5.5/1
The Dark Side 12/1
Grey’s Anatomy 15/1
Blue Balls LOL
Grinders Championship Odds

Team Mike has well…..Mike Malicki, THE REIGNING, DEFENDING, HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION of the WORLD. We all remember the performance in last session’s finals. Good luck knocking out Ali. He also has a nice supporting cast with Wayne, Richie, Josh Lanzot, and Jon. The betting favorite.
Why? They have the human cheat code. Why not? The human cheat code gets scrambled and Richie goes into jack-mode trying to save them.

Team Curt is the number 1 overall seed. They have the best player rated by GAPE (second isn’t even close) in Mike G. Curt isn’t a bad Robin to Mike’s Batman. They also have league vets Kellen and E. Kellen is one of the best on ball defenders in the league and E continues to add to his Grinders scoring legacy. I didn’t forget about Helmet but his team usually “forgets” to play him. Team Curt also draws the winner of Dark Side and Team Timmy in a back to back scenario. Nothing like picking a fight after your opponent is already beat up. Advantage Team Curt.
Why? Maybe the best 1-2 combo in the league. Why not? Curt and Kellen can build their own f’n skyscraper with the brick they jack up.

The Dark Side is streaking these days and it’s not naked Cole in the rafters. They’ve won 2 in a row. Justin looks like he could be rounding into form. Eric has been playing lock-down D on most people’s guards and the trio of Vaillancourt, AK47, and Cole have been playing bully-ball with their smaller, less trips to the buffet opponents. They could pull off a miracle but it’s going to be tough. They’d have to first beat the all-stars of Team Timmy and then turn around and knock off the 1-seed…..all just to make it to next week and a date with Team Mike. Ouch.
Why? Biggest team in the league. Tough to score on. Why not? Their best players don’t always step up when the time comes

Team Timmy is an interesting bet. They have more athletic and basketball talent than any other team in the league and yet they fell to the 5-seed. Is it cause they’re soft? Is it cause they’re too small? I’m not sure of the answer but something is not quite right. Coaching? Game plan? I don’t love their draw against a much bigger Dark Side team so I’m not sure they’ll make it out of the first round but if they do……………..
Why? Can score with anyone. Crazy talent Why not? See The Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz.

Blue Balls. We here at HQ haven’t figured out how the hell this team has been winning, but they have…..somehow. That all stops tonight. No Grant, no f’n prayer. I know one person “doesn’t make a team” but in this case, it does. This team without Grant is like the Timberwolves without KAT. Tune in to see if Ford “tries” this time. Maybe Jon will set a Grinders record for 3’s made tonight. Maybe Nixon will make shots that actually help his team instead of costing them the game. Maybe Doyle will have one of those “Doyle is on” games. I’m not betting on those things to happen. 50/1 is generous. SEASON OVER.
Why???????? Why not? No Grant. Nuf said.

GRINDERS AWARDS:
Grinding Gaper: Mike G.
Grind-less Gaper: Kellen Owen

Grinders League Leaders:

GAPE: Mike G.

Points: Mike Malicki

Rebounds: Mike G.

Assists: Chris Cole

Steals: Mike G.

Blocks: Jon Witt

3pters: Jon Tirado

All Grinders Team:

C: Grant Decz

F: Mike G.

F/G: Mike Malicki

F/G: Chris Cole

by Kenny Blankenship

Session Review: 2021-01

Grinders at The Eldridge Club Season 1 review……

The first season at the new diggs went off great. Folks learned how to do the scoreboard and shot clock quickly, adding a flair of the big leagues that Grinders has desperately missed. New people have been hanging out after games now that the bar is a stone’s throw away. The heckling has even gotten better during games due to the swing lube allowed in the gym. Our website is looking better than ever and we even have a Twitch or a Snappychat or a Remind (whatever the hell the kids use these days) to engage in daily Grinders tom-foolery. I think the changes to Grinders have been a positive one.

As for the season…….We had an undefeated team in the regular season for the first (?) time in Grinders history. Team Pink looked like the 73 win Warriors team from a few years ago walking over the league to a 6-0 record. Team Blue was the predominant favorite pre-season and looked like they were unstoppable…..until a 4-game slide made them look less than G-league going into the playoffs. Teams Black and Grey looked to be lost throughout most of the season but occasionally looked like they were figuring it out (Curt drops 40, Grey beats Blue for first win). We had people make their debuts (Tirado, Pauly J., Wayne, Eric) and saw old stars return (Grant, Curt, Jeff May, AK47). Teams were getting used to the 3-ball being in play and how that was going to affect things. Hell we even had a buzzer-beater from “half-court”. All-in-all it was a fun first regular season. We even had our first Grinders awards. This session we need to figure out a way to make that ceremony better.

On to the playoffs we go…….

Team Black vs Team Blue: No one knew what was going to happen in this one. Black finally had Curt and Grant and could beat anyone on a given day. Blue was riding a 4-game losing streak and looked like they were in trouble. So to be frank, this one didn’t live up to the billing. Grant and Curt were brutal going a combined 7-50. Mike missed more layups than Ford. Luckily for Black the supporting cast of Jon, Pauly J, and Worm had it going and kept them in it for most of the game. Blue relied on Jon “This time Robin saves Batman” Witt who dropped 24 by the game’s end (his first clutch performance since the Reagan administration). Blue eventually pulled away and walked into the finals on the red-brick road that Curt and Grant shot for them.

Team Pink vs Team Grey: This game looked more like a WWF wrestling match by the end than a free-flowing, highly-talented basketball game. Pink got out to a quick start raining 3’s all over Grey’s faces from everywhere on the court. Stats don’t lie. Grey was the worst shooting team in the league and Pink had the best defense. It was no surprise that Pink was way ahead at the start. Then something funny happened. Pink forgot how to put their balls in the hole. They forgot who the right team to pass to was. Grey slowly, methodically crept back in and made it a game early in the second half. Luckily for Pink (who was terrible in the second half), Grey was even worse at finishing and Pink snuck out a bad win.

Team Pink vs Team Blue: Mike happened………that is all. Words can’t put into picture what his performance looked like, combine Jordan’s shoulder-shrug game in the Finals, Kobe’s 81 vs Toronto, and Magic’s performance in game 6 of the Finals as a rookie. It was simply spectacular. Oh, Witt, Doyle, and Nixon were also on the court……..we think…….maybe.
As for Pink, 7-1, and a missed opportunity for Grinders immortality as the ONLY undefeated team ever. Too bad, so sad. If the Finals were a chicken bone Team Pink woulda gone Mama Cass all over it. The Cash Cousins no-showed, Ford disappeared, Jeff May left his game on the trainer’s table, and Cole still has 3rd burns from getting torched by Mike (47 pts, 11 3’s).

All-Grinders

First TeamC/F: Grant Decz

F/G: Mike Malicki

F/G: Tommy Hughes

F/G: Richie Creamer

by Kenny Blankenship

Playoffs?!!??

Round 1 Round 2 Round 3
   
 
 
 
 
  
  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
  
 
 
 
 

Word is Team Blue is going to lose… because Witt?